To stop the Train pull the Chain!

" Beta, I read all of your blogs...", said Mom. For a moment or two there was an awkward silence on both sides.

" Are wah! That's good....Great in fact! ", I replied trying to contain my nervousness and shaky voice.

" Don't be nervous beta....I can understand the emotional roller coaster ride you had been going through when I read your posts and I can easily tell that you are badly confused with your funny 'Multiple Crush Disorder'!" she laughed.

" Mom", I replied," There's this girl whom I like so much..." thereafter I narrated some extremely personal things to her which had been consuming my mind for quite sometime. 

[In the background that Chai wala was playing this on his music system - Mai Pareshaan...Pareshaan - Isshaqzaade ]

She listened to it very calmly and what she advised me after that truly moved me.

" Just remember this mantra dear - Do not let people influence your decisions, your life and your aim. No matter how close they seem to be or how you feel about them. Don't drag your life after things which you know, are not worth your time and for that matter even the persons which you think you like so much. Its just INFATUATION, NOTHING MORE otherwise you wouldn't take decisions so fast. There's nothing to worry about and I believe you will come out of it very soon...

Time changes every thing and YOU are the time!" she added. 

I had tears in my eyes and a lump of pain in my throat for she handled me so well, without getting upset about my idiotic feats.  

" Many many happy returns Mom! Happy Birthday!", I replied.

" Thank you so much Beta! By the way, I am still waiting for your high-school adventures....

Love you... 

And listen...Drive Carefully....Stay away from oily eatables...Drink lots of water....Do not roam around too late at night....Ok?? Till then....Take Care....B'bye!" She replied cheerfully and then we ended the call.

As I recall the conversation and jot it down here, I notice a very important aspect of our life that we all go through, every day and that is, being influenced by people and our thoughts getting clouded by other worth less opinions. Starting right from the stream we were to take up after our high-school till the dress code expected out of us for attending a social event, every little thing is being influenced in some way or the other. And so is the fact that we let our minds get indulged in things like having a girl-friend/boy-friend [read that as arm candy] just because our room-mates or friends have one [or 'many' in today's scenario] :-P B-)

I was indeed going through ups and downs emotionally trying to come out of this silly infatuation thing but Mom's words helped me get through it and broaden my outlook. She made me understand that its good to confess and let that particular person know about your feelings so that you don't have any regrets later; BUT at the same time its equally important to understand that the person in front MAY NOT reciprocate or agree with your thoughts and feelings. So do not ever expect anything in return. It can ruin your mood esp when your feelings are not valued enough by that particular person. Same had happened with me too and can happen to anyone leading to confusion and depression. o_O

This is what most of us tend to forget and then what we get to see is Emotional Attyachaar , heated text messages and our talk-time balance being wasted on arguments and birth of new age sadistic Devdas-es [and pocket money on Old Monk].

Also, if you do not feel for some one while they do, do NOT play with their feelings, keep you words clear and gentle but firm and thus steer clear from troubling them [speaking out of personal experience]

These things influence and disturb us the most when we try to focus on something.

" Be yaar aaj din bhar me uska call nahi aya! "
[ She didn;t call me all day! ]

" Are usne reply nahi diya mujhe "
[ She didn't give any reply to me at all ]

" Hamara phir se jhagda ho gaya! "
[ We had an argument again ]

" I have hurt her again "

" Wo maan hi nahi rahi yaar! "
[ She is not ready to accept my proposal ]

" Kitna attitude se baat karta re tu! "
[ What an uncooperative attitude you have! ]

" Mujhe bore ho raha tha isliye tujhe message kiya "
[ I was free and getting bored so I sent u a message ]

" Yaar mai bohot busy rehti hu din bhar isliye time nahi milta "
[ I am too busy these days hence I don't get time ]

Aren't these phrases familiar? Don't you think they are outright irritating and that's what happens when we indulge in too much Puppy Love!

Likewise, when people try to influence your decisions don't give away to them. 

" Are apna main aim kya hai..Paisa kamana..Koi bhi job chalta "

[Bro! Our main aim is to earn money...Any sort of job is suitable then] 

Well, that's HIS opinion not yours. Don't bother about it and stay focused . 

" Aise kapde pehen ke bahar jaegi toh log kya kahenge!"

[What would people think of you if you wear these zazzy clothes] 

WTF! If a girl is comfortable in her attire then why should she bother about what those shabby bald uncles or heavy-weight aunties think.

" Be wo ladki har roz kisi aur ko ghumati re! Apna to jamtaich nahi ba..." 

[She is not of my type..she keeps hanging around with different guys every evening!]

Just because someone saw that girl wearing hot pants and walking with a guy in a mall doesn't necessarily mean its true and she doesn't have dignity for herself. Broaden your mindset guys.

" Ab meri yaad nahi ati na tujhe?... Koi aur mil gayi/gaya lagta tujhe "

[You don't contact me these days..Seems you found someone else]

Goddamn! This is a very deadly weapon esp when you need to be alone for sometime. It deviates you from you track and doesn't even pay off. Tell that person that you are NOT their boyfriend/girlfriend and ask that person to stop acting like one and free your mind.

And how can I forget this -

" Abe ye question last 5 saal me kabhi nahi pucha...Iska koi chance nahi hai ane ka!"

[This question has not been asked since the last 5 years..There's no chance that it would be asked in the exam ]

Please remember, in our case its always the other way round. It will definitely pop up in the question paper. :-P ;-)

So many things and so little time but just give it a thought and relate this to your own specific situations [If any]. Think on your own [ not by those cheesy  lines from that special person] and if you're really confused, talk to someone who is really trustworthy and try to stop the Train of your mind from getting derailed by others, by pulling the Chain of your own thoughts!

Phew! That's too much dose for one day!

MOM ROCKS!

Cheers!