Mai Anaadi Tu Khilaadi!

After making us wait for 4 hours we were called in for the interview rounds.

The bald bastard interviewer said, 

" Introduce yourself "

I described him about myself and all that I could squeeze in that short time and at the end I mentioned that I have had taken industrial training at HAL and two other companies.

To that, he frowns and with an utter tone of disgust he says, 

" Your Dad is in HAL that's why! I don't count it"

I raise my brows in a rage of fury as he grins to me as if he was saying I learnt nothing there.

The same a**hole asks my friend why he had a year gap between his high school and engineering. He described his situation that his family wasn't financially very strong and they wouldn't have been able to bear the grunt of expense had he chosen to go with open caste. He had to wait a year for the caste validity certificate and then cracked the CET and got a chance to pursue engineering.

To this the d!ck head replies, 

" Are toh ST ka certificate nikalna tha na. Fokat me ho jaata. Aur tu reservation se aya hai, Common Entrace Test crack karne se nahi! "

[You should have obtained the ST validity certificate. You could have got every thing for free. And don't tell me about CET, you are here because of reservations! ]

There after he asked questions after questions with no logical sense. And to some of the questions that had some logic and we successfully answered it. He would not accept it and would term our answers as wrong. On top of that he asked a hell lot of questions that were in no way related to the post we had applied for. 

What's the point in trying to know if the mosquito flying inside a train in the same direction is faster that the train or not. And what's the point to ask if Maruti Swift Petrol can run on Diesel or not? Why would someone fill diesel in a petrol vehicle?  

Though I answered it, after the residual petrol in the lines get used gets used the engine would knock and eventually fail to run because diesel calorific values are different, need higher compression and it doesn't evaporate very well. 

To this he asks, " Engine me knocking hoga? " [The engine will still knock or what? ]

I again try to explain him but he interrupt me and says, " Take my next question. This is not your cup of tea!" I wanted to f*ck him there itself.

Then there was this particularly sick question. "WHY?" Just stick a 'why' after every statement that the candidate says and sick his balls dry to molecules. Why is this so? Why on the answer? Why on the question? And Why on his a**?

Ok, I agree that its my mistake that I did not prepare well. But what's the point of an interview if the employer doesn't get to know if the candidate actually has got some knowledge regarding his needs or not. 

I had been itching to write this since so long. What do interviewers think of themselves? Why don't they constructively use the powers given to them instead of insulting the candidate? Why to deem him a loser by asking just a few completely useless questions that doesn't even relate to the concerned field. And when the candidate asks him for clarification they say ,

" Its only me who will ask the questions in the room! " or 

"You will tell the candidates outside " or the best of all , 

" Tumhare basics clear nahi hai, mujhe mat pucho! " 

[Your basics aren't clear. Don't ask me! ]

I had been thinking instead of having the same old interview processes with Group discussions or aptitude tests, can't we have a real life model kit wherein the candidate will have to solve the problem or mention down the analysis he has applied and the technical steps he would take to solve the problem. 

Or may be we can have those puzzle simulators wherein on applying various techniques we can get different degrees of efficiency from the system or achieve the desired target.

And there could be a hell lot of options. Why depend on time consuming, human foolishness and arrogance that arises when power is conferred to someone. Why not let the question itself decide the gravity of the situation instead of instantaneous decisions!

May be the day I get into Lamborghini or when I start my own business I will get back to these knuckleheads and f*ck them hard and show them the respect every candidate deserves. Just because they come for getting a job does't mean they are worthless. 

I am disappointed that I got rejected at the hands of someone who didn't even know how to behave with people. I have not lost the hope though. Thanks to Dad. He sent me this text after I informed him about the interview -

"Why do you feel sorry? That was not your desired line. You need to prepare for HAL and then the bigger one - Lamborghini. Do your part, work even harder, refresh yourself and things will be set all right.

I HAVE FAITH IN YOU. LOVE YOU."

This single text re-energized me!

[I can hear my neighbors' TV airing the song Hai Junoon - New York and their kids screaming the same ]

Cheers!